I take them for granted.

Just a minute ago while brushing my teeth, I realised that I have been terrible to Ling Ling today.

When my mom told me to go over to the other room to accompany Ling Ling so that she could go to the market this morning, I must admit I was pretty irritated. I was woken up from my sleep early in the morning so that Ling Ling could have someone to look after her while she continues to sleep. I complied, and moved over - except that I continued to sleep in the room.

Around thirty minutes later she woke up and asked for milk, holding up her nearly empty milk bottle up to me. I was irritated that I was woken up yet again, and so I shouted at her and went back to sleep.

When I woke up minutes later I found her drinking the overnight milk from the bottle. She was hungry and there was no one to help her.

I am such a moron.

And I didn't even realise how badly I have treated her until now. It has been nearly twelve hours.

She is just a toddler, and I cannot believe I did that to her.

I take my family members for granted. Sometimes I just treat them so badly and I never felt it was wrong until when I thought about what I did for the day late at night .

What is the use of saying "I am sorry" when you have already done what you should not?

I think I wrote an entry about me mistreating my family members, relatives and friends a year back or something, and I ashamed of myself - I have not changed a single bit. I still take them for granted.

I need to change. I must change. This cannot continue, or I will certainly regret.

I hate myself for being like this. Why must I think, subconsciously, that it is alright I treat them like this? It is definitely not alright, and why is it that I just cannot get this into my head?

Do something, idiot. Do something.